Thursday, March 01, 2007


POLICE ON MY BACK

I’m not sure why the Police’s reunion tour has got me so wound up. Is it because Sting rivals Don Henley at the top of my list of all time despised rock stars? Is it because I never really thought they were that great? I mean, name one Police song that is a stone classic. You can’t do it. Several good songs… no stone classics. Is it because a good seat costs in excess of $225? I think I’m getting warm. Is it because the only time I saw The Police the ticket was free? It’s true – you could look it up – at the Walnut Street Theater – a WIOQ free concert promotion in April 1979. Is it because I’ll never, ever understand why rock fans settle for being half a block away from any performer and calling that a concert? Let’s put it this way… if you’ve spent more than $20 for a concert ticket and you need binoculars (or one of those giant screen TVs) to tell if your favorite rock star is smiling, you got ripped off jack.

So as a public service to those thinking about plunking down your hard earned cash for the Citizen’s Bank Police event, I am here to provide you a list of alternate ways of spending your $225:

A. You could attend the following thirteen shows:

1. Badly Drawn Boy – TLA (3/3) – $21.50
2. The Thermals – First Unitarian Church (3/6) – $10
3. The Shins – Electric Factory (3/13) - $27
4. Jesse Malin – Tin Angel (3/15) - $16
5. Hoodoo Gurus – World Café Live (3/21) - $18
6. The Hold Steady – Chameleon Club (3/22) - $10
7. Broken West – Khyber (3/25) - $8
8. Ted Leo – TLA (3/28) - $14
9. Alejandro Escovedo – Tin Angel (3/30) - $25
10. TV on the Radio – Troc (4/20) - $16
11. Fountains of Wayne – Troc (4/26) - $14
12. Peter, Bjorn & John – TLA (5/3) - $16
13. The Arcade Fire – Tower (5/5) - $31

B. Buy a 40 GB IPOD.

C. Subscribe to MOJO for 2 years.

D. Get 15-20 cds (even more if you get lucky browsing the used bins) at Main Street Music in Manayunk. Call Pat at 215-487-7732… they've got everything.

E. 11 lap dances… or so I’m told.

F. Buy A LOT of beer.

G. Buy my writing partner a plane ticket to Philly... or send me to Kansas City.

Please remember…CAVEAT EMPTOR. Do you really want to spend two hours watching someone that might be Sting? You won’t be able to tell.

1 comment:

Snowwhite said...

But then you would have seen a dozen great shows, + the Arcade Fire, + missed Sting's tremendous guns on a 35 foot screen (the same guns that my wife would like to bronze and keep on our mantle, and stare at longingly while subjecting me to '10 Summoner's Tales' on infinite repeat).