Friday, March 16, 2007

Maybe they don’t know what “definitive” means . . .

Because everyone loves a list, the good folks at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame have produced one of their own, The Definitive 200 Rock and Roll Albums. While there’s plenty of orthodoxy here (Sgt. Pepper’s, as mandated by the Omnibus Rock Album List Normalization Act of 1986, takes the top spot), some of the choices are, um, peculiar. Here are some of my favorite entries:

13. Santana, Supernatural

Likewise, I had this one at number 13, but on my list of the 15 best albums I bought in September 1999.

21. Shania Twain, Come on Over
33. Dixie Chicks, Wide Open Spaces

Apparently, these are the two finest country albums of all time. Now they tell me. And I’ve wasted so much time listening to Waylon’s Honky Tonk Heroes.

34. Miles Davis, Kind of Blue

Even Natalie Maines is a little embarrassed by this.

48. Dave Matthews Band, Crash
49. Rolling Stones, Sticky Fingers

I have so much to say, so much to say, so much to say about this pairing, but this is a family forum.

71. The Eagles, Hell Freezes Over

Look, they put the punch line right in the title!

74. Phil Collins, No Jacket Required

Apparently, no judgment required, either.

96. Creed, Human Clay
97. The Clash, London Calling

If there’s anything good about Joe Strummer’s death, it’s that he didn’t live to learn that he’s nearly as good as Scott Stapp.

98. Celine Dion, Falling Into You

But I’m sure he’d be relieved to know that he’s a tad better than Celine.

107. Kenny G, Breathless
108. NWA, Straight Outta Compton
109. Sex Pistols, Never Mind the Bollocks, Here’s the Sex Pistols
110. The Beatles, Rubber Soul
111. Radiohead, OK Computer

Breathless? I’m speechless.

154. Will Smith, Big Willie Style
155. Prince, Sign O’ the Times
156. Public Enemy, It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back
157. Bob Dylan, Blood on the Tracks

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times. If there’s one song that speaks to the current state of the human condition any more than “Sign of the Times,” “Bring the Noise” or “Idiot Wind,” it’s “Gettin’ Jiggy Wit It.”

173. Soundtrack, Forrest Gump
174. Al Green, Call Me
175. Curtis Mayfield, Superfly

Three titans of soul music. James Brown, for the record, doesn’t appear on the list

(Hat tip: Good Nonsense).


The Boy said...

Holy crap...I hadn't even noticed Creed at #96...that's...yeah, if this is a family forum, then I'm just going to stop talking.

bonjourtristesse said...

Creed??OMG!! Retitle it Rock n Roll Hall of Shame or Take the Blame for Mass Suicides! great blog, guys, thanks!

Matthew said...

wow. That may be the shittiest list of "great albums" ever. The Rolling Stone Top 500 is a shit ton better.